It’s time to Let Go of The Past Completely…
There came a point when I realized, no matter how much or often I validated my victimhood; no person, place or thing, no substance, or behavior; was capable of healing my lost Innoncence.
This was the sad truth about my powerlessness to deal with it in the present, safely, therapeutically, because it was causing damage and conflict in every area of my life.
It was time to let go of my trauma event memory. To find a way to return it to it’s rightful owner, the past aspect of me that actually suffered the event.
But I learned there was more work to be done. it wasn't enough to experience the healing event and enjoy one or a couple of night’s peaceful sleep. There was the weeks and months later; How was I to protect myself from being triggered unexpectedly, or the possibility of experiencing Nightmares, Flashbacks or Night Terrors again.
What was needed was for me to become a new creation; to cast off the old self and become reborn. this sounds daunting but, taking it one day at a time, one finds it achievable.
When I attempt to explain this transformation, I share that my mind was full of victimhood and all its trappings. As I embraced a new way of life, a new attitude, a new perspective, I began to take on new concepts about Life on Life's Terms, and allowing God to deal with my outcomes as well as my past and future, I would never be given more than I could handle.
As i embraced this change, the old got pushed to one side of my mind and this new perspective or attitude replaced it to the forefront of my mind, this meant when anything happened, there was a good chance I would respond to it with one of these new responses rather than reacting with one of the old reactions.
A big part of this renewing of the mind was eliciting as much help, knowledge and mentoring from as many sources as possible.
The world of 12 step recovery groups has become for me The Promised Land of Self Healing.
In this posting i am going to share a passage from the daily devotional :
“The Language of Letting Go” by Melody Beattie, Co-Dependency No More
Hanging onto old relationships [june13]
We want to travel baggage free on this journey. It makes the trip easier. Some of the baggage we can let go of is lingering feelings and unfinished business with past relationships; anger, resentments, feelings of victimization, hurt, longing.
If we have not put closure on a relationship; if we cannot walk away in peace, we have not yet learned our lesson. That may mean we have to have another go-around with that lesson before we are ready to move on.
We may want to do a 4th Step [ a written inventory of our relationships]
& a 5th step [an admittance of our wrongs].
What feelings did we leave with in a particular relationship?
Are we still carrying those feelings around?
Do we want the heaviness and impact of that baggage on our behavior today.
Are we still feeling victimized, rejected, or bitter about something that happened 2, 5, 10 or even 20 years ago?
It may be time to let it go!
It may be time to open ourselves to the true lesson from that experience.
It may be time to put past relationships to rest, so we are free to go on to new, more rewarding experiences.
We can choose to live in the past or we can choose to finish our old business from the past & open ourselves to the beauty of today.
Let Go of Your Baggage from Past Relationships!
Today, I will open myself to the cleansing and healing process that will put closure on yesterday and open me to the best today and tomorrow, has to offer in my relationships.
There is so much truth in this, we are powerless over actions in our past and futures .
All we have is today, this present.
We give the past back to its rightful owner
&
We ask The Creator to take care of our futures, He knows what is to happen and is better prepared to handle whatever life serves up, so just let Him take these worries for us.
It was time for me to stop running, I was drained, mentally, physically, emotionally & physically.